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Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Goldilocks and the Perfect Day Care

Finding a good home care or day care provider for your kids (the most precious thing in your life) is akin to the story of Goldilocks. You need to find one that is "just right." But, alas, therein lies the problem - finding the perfect day care provider is not a destination but a journey. It never ends. It started before my first daughter was born in the Spring of 2007, and has not ended. Here, we are, 2+ years later, now with my infant daughter and we are still searching for the perfect solution. We started with day care provider #1 after about 3 months of my first daughter's birth but she could not care for my daughter well. My discerning 3-month old did not like this woman at all and we'd drop her off in her car seat and when we arrived after a few hours, my daughter would be there crying in her car seat. It was like this woman had no clue what to do. This home care provider was NOT right.

My older daughter actually picked the home care provider she is currently going to. At 6 months of age, she jumped from my arms into this lady's arms when we went to interview her. No one else had this effect on her. In fact, she even cried with my husband and only liked my mom and me. So, it was set - it was destiny. But alas, as you know, this home care provider is less than perfect too - they do great with the kids and they kids love them and identify with them but their home is so far away from the house and far away from my husband's employment too. It is a pain to take them there and we wish this provider would come to the house. But alas, they charge a lot and the pains to take them back and forth is starting to take its toll -plus, if they are away or have an appointment, one of us has to work from home or take the day off. This home care provider is right but not perfect. I should mention we tried our older daughter in a public day care near my employment last year- she was only 13 months old and she did terribly. She was sick all the time, and the thought of leaving her killed me- she cried and cried. It was too early to do that - That day care situation was NOT right at all.

So, now here we are delving into another home care situation - where someone comes to our home and watches both our kids. Pros- the girls get to stay home and do not have to weather road conditions or storms. But, alas, there are many cons - they are not familiar with this lady and the lady would need to learn where things are in our home, how to heat bottles for my little one and not confuse them with the Vitamin D milk we give our toddler. One HUGE problem - there is a communication gap. This lady only speaks Hindi and my daughter knows another Indian language and English. This is the biggest obstacle right now and I am not sure I am ready for this change despite the girls being more adaptable and flexible than I am. Someone new will have to learn all over what we spend months teaching the current home care provider- how to put my infant and toddler to sleep for nap times, what temperature both kids like their milk, and how to care for them. I am just not sure I will ever find that perfect day care situation .... unlike Goldilocks, I do not think I will ever be sated.