Until recently, I was a single female and often, I did the dreaded thing on Saturday nights: rent a movie, pop some popcorn, and watched alone. When I did this, I felt the inevitable pang of jealousy at all those other women who had dates, husbands, and boyfriends. I always thought how nice it would be if ... I had someone! I always envied the grass in someone else's yard and wish mine was like theirs.
Then, low and behold, we get a date - a scary one and we think, "I was better off alone, snug as a bug on my sofa, watching a movie and eating my low fat air-popped popcorn - alone!" It is the syndrome that many single females face as they approach their late 20's and facec the beginning of a new decade. We wonder what our lives would be like with a man we love. We meet so many and then, we finally get one love in our life, and we begin to long for the days of old. Days when we could do what we want, wear what we want, and go several days without straightening our hair. The problem is not one of being needy or having high expectations. It is a problem of never being satisfied with what we have and who we are. We are always longing for more of what we don't have instead of striking a proper balance and having it all! How can we really start to love someone else, when we truly believe the grass is always greener in someone else's yard? What we fail to internalize and acknowledge is that there are weeds in that other person's yard as well. It is inevitable, with the green grass, come the weeds. No matter how "happy" or "perfect" we believe others may be, there are weeds in their yard as well.
How we manage our weeds of envy, greed, and lack of satisfaction vary from woman to woman. But we have to manage them and realize that the only green grass in our lives is our own and perhaps somewhere else, a woman is happier than you are at this very moment but she too has weeds of her own to manage.
Rent a movie, grab a big bucket of popcorn and some candy. Enjoy your time alone. Do not worry about what others are doing at that moment and only take solace in your "grass." When you are with that someone special, enjoy and cherish what time you have and the activities you do - life is too short to led the weeds control your garden, and it is a beautiful garden!
