I always hear the phrase “What goes to Vegas, stays in Vegas” and similar phrases to describe some type of pact between members that what goes on a work trip, stays there. Well, as you know 10 out of 10 times, what goes to Vegas does not always stay in Vegas and the like. When I left my job and the service a few years ago, I was sure that I would never see those people again and by “those people” I mean the people I could really not stand to work with any longer. As I have come to learn, you never really a job or the people behind. You can burn a bridge but somehow that bridge gets rebuilt and amazingly, you find yourself standing on the edge of it looking at it again. You end up running into those people more often than not. In fact, I never seem to run into the people I want to run into (a long, lost friend, etc), and always tend to run into those that I wish would never see…. ever again!
I went to a seminar this past week and ran into someone fitting that description. As I surveyed the room, I realized it was this person and quickly did an about face and then, thought to myself, “Great! This is what I have to resign myself to – I will always keep running into these people.” It was bad enough I ran into this person’s “not so better half” a month ago but now I have to keep seeing this individual and the spouse at seminars. It is easy to run into people who are in the same or similar career field and industry. It also is an unfortunate fact that you run into people who are working or living in the same general area- anything within 150 miles is local area as far as I am concerned. Needless to say, it was an unpleasant encounter and made the day that much more unpleasant. For some reason, running into this particular person made me realize how horrible my life was back then- it was pre-daughter, pre-marriage, but more importantly, it was just a horrible time in my life – for the first time in my career, I was at a political assignment where my supervisor did not like me much and this particular individual and the spouse made my life even more difficult. They were “in” with the boss and I was obviously, “out”. It was a tough working relationship and the spouse and another individual in the office even had the gall to accuse me of a crime. Nothing ever came of that of course except for the mental and emotional torture that ensued but needless to say, each time I fell (or rather, was thrown down) in the three years I was in this job, I picked myself up, brushed off, and kept going. Looking back, I am amazed I survived with only a few scrapes and bruises. But, running into this individual at the seminar this past week, it all came rushing back – all that I had suppressed.
Seeing this individual brought it all back and that was what made the day unpleasant. It was not necessarily the grotesque sight and presence of this individual but rather, the flood of bad memories. This individual was, in my mind, the catalyst of some of the horrible things that happened to good people in that job. They were, in a nutshell, career climbers and were going to get ahead and their way at any cost. No matter who got hurt or left behind, they always seemed to land on their feet. Seeing this individual brought back a lot of baggage from my time in this job but it also made me thankful for where I was in life today- I felt gratitude to God for moving past that phase in my life – I was destined to go through it. It made me grateful for all the gifts in my life – I was lucky I got out alive and with little damage. I was able to get a job where I am appreciated and work well with my colleagues. For example, just today, another colleague who is looking for a new job also gave me a couple of leads on some job postings. I am appreciated by my supervisor and I work with kind, caring people who go above and beyond – they are selfless and while career-oriented, they do not walk over someone to get ahead. I have a baby girl who I am so excited to have in my life- she is a blessing and I sometimes feel I have been touched by the Lord himself when she holds onto me. Motherhood is the closest thing I have ever felt to touching the face of God and I am thankful for that. I have a husband who loves me and cares about me and we live together which is a blessing too. I cannot imagine working 90 miles away and living 90 miles away from him a few times a week. I know people live apart all the time and stay married and I can see doing that temporarily (for a few years) after about 15-20 years of marriage but, right now, there is no other place I’d rather be than at my home which is truly made a home by the presence of my daughter and my husband.
Yes, seeing this person again made me realize how much I went through and what I endured a few years ago but it is also made me appreciate all the good things that came since I made the decision to leave it all behind. In life, we see the good, the bad and the ugly, but we also get to express gratitude for the many blessings in our lives and like most other days, just carry on
